"Spring Time Panic Attacks"

Sitting in the grass
With the sky gone black for the night
And the wind rushing to bed before morning.
A half raised panic attack is the perfect place 
To think if 1000 ways to disappear
And a 1000 ways we fit together best.
and at least one thing that'll keep us apart. 
My eyes will leak lighter fluid for the first time in years
Gasoline will set my heart on fire one of these days
I am getting tired of the feeling of butane in my veins.
My bloodstream is like battery acid
And for the first time since I started dreaming, I now understand why you could never love me. 
"She is just like you and she is perfect for me."
I think what you meant to say is that she is just like me but she is pretty.
She is just like me, but you love her.
and she is nothing like me because she doesn't love you back.

Surprisingly, I find myself sick at the thought
of your life spent with someone else.
who is just like me, but not at all the same.
Oddly enough I find myself angry at you
for letting her string you along the same 
way I allow myself to trail your every step.
We are the same. We are both clueless when 
it comes to things like this.
I prayed for God to send me a sign
to tell me if I was supposed to wait for you to wise up.
I think I finally got the message. To be honest,
it was not the direction I expected him to guide me in. 

She is just like me but pretty.
She is just like me but she doesn't have demons in her
brain stem that step into her dreams.
She is just like me but she has her shit together.
She is just like me, if I was better. 
So in that way, she is nothing like me.